Charmed Monday Minute Jan. 15

Happy Martin Luther King Day and best wishes all ‘round...

On the resolutions front, I discovered a great way to keep up with my resolve to have some spectacular fun each day. I’m calling each tasty life-treat a piece of candy and, in contrast to those years of resolutions about never having candy, I’m now resolving to have at least one piece of this kind of candy every single day. On the weekends I can have more. Yesterday, for instance, I nearly downed a box of it:

First piece - a session with my personal trainer. He is my big splurge, but so worth it. With all I’ve been going through with the headaches I wouldn’t have done anything if I didn’t have the commitment to see him twice a week.

Second piece – a visit with my friend Lane. I was just going over there to drop off a blender, but it was such a sweet time. We’ve known each since 1989 and every time I see her, I see myself.

Third piece – church at Unity of NY (www.unityofnewyork.org) and it was really special. The minister asked everyone who was going through a remarkable healing to come on stage. I went up. I was nervous. I’ve spoken there four times and I don’t get nervous; I know I’m a good speaker and I have good information and there’s nothing to be afraid of. But this was different: I was being vulnerable. I was saying, “I’ve been going through a very dark night and I trust I’m coming through it.” There were about 20 us onstage (and it is a stage – the church meets in a concert hall, Symphony Space, on the Upper West Side of Manhattan), and the whole congregation prayed for us. It was extremely powerful.

Fourth piece – lunch with my friend Olivia. She is a super-networking expert (www.spitfireteam.com) and a super human being. We went to Mana, a macrobiotic restaurant on Amsterdam Avenue and totally caught up. (And a lovely young woman came up to me there thanking me for these Monday minutes! I was so surprised I think I mumbled. Please, if you’re seeing this, drop me an email via Joya - charmedassistant@aol.com -- and introduce yourself so I’ll know you by name next time.)

Fifth piece – an afternoon class in restorative yoga at Yogaworks (www.yogaworks.com). I was introduced to restorative yoga at the spa (if you didn’t read last week’s minute, the spa where I greeted this New Year is www.newagehealthspa.com). It is a luscious form of gentle yoga -- all about props and getting in a perfect, comfy position and staying there for a very long time – like fifteen minutes. In the meantime, one of the two instructors comes around to give hands-on corrections, like gentle mini-massages, while at the same time one of the instructors talks about some yoga precept. Yesterday, in honor of Martin Luther King Day, she talked about ahimsa, the power of non-injury, dynamic harmlessness, the roots of Gandhi’s and King’s nonviolent movements.

When you get five pieces of candy in a day, it sweetens the sour stuff like having to take down the Christmas decorations – but even that I did with the show-tunes channel on, which enlivened things quite a bit.

Some other people sent in resolutions to share:

My resolution this year is to be vegan. I've been a vegetarian for 25 years but I finally felt the push to go vegan. I guess I finally figured out it was really possible especially since Native Foods moved into the city! My second resolution is to try and live in balance. I am forever doing too many things. Maybe they are really only one resolution! -- Bajamama

I technically do New Year’s affirmations. The work “resolution” seems so negative – you resolve to do this or not to do that. It puts a down spin on whatever your goal or pledge for the year would be, which technically puts a stamp of failure on it. An affirmation on the other hand is a positive statement or pledge in which a great outcome is visualized. My affirmations: losing some weight so that my lifespan is stretched and I can have as much active fun as possible with my three young grandsons, donating 20% of the “clutter” in my home to charity (not to mention the clothes that will no longer fit me as I lose weight), and learning a foreign language well enough that I can help someone if they are having trouble communicating with others – you never know when a situation like that will come up, and I am sure it is a helpless feeling. There is also a desire to write and illustrate a children’s book, but that may take several years of affirmations to complete. -- Paula

(If you’d like your resolutions in the newsletter – there are two more Mondays in January, so there’s time, send your resolutions to Joya: charmedassistant@aol.com.)

Question of the week: “My current problem is menopausal weight gain around my middle. I hope to start the New Year with continued dedication to health and fitness, and intend to re-read Fit From Within during my holiday vacation. Is there anything in particularly you can recommend that would target any hormonal issues that might exist for weight gain around the waist?” – Irene Irene, you have discovered a fact of life that the world doesn’t seem to want to tell us until we get there. I talk in the first part of Younger by the Day about how there was invasion of the body snatchers in my bedroom, and how virtually overnight my flat stomach was traded for a round one and my round bottom for a flat one. It was horrifying. On the one hand, it’s nature. Just as an eighteen-year-old body and an eight-year-old body are shaped differently, a woman’s body after menopause has a different shape from the one she had before. Somebody even said it’s nature’s way to make sure men won’t be attracted to women who aren’t fertile, but that is just depressing and ugly. So, in my experience and opinion, you can’t totally change this nature-imposed shape-shifting without surgery, but you can do a lot with exercise. You know you need cardio work to keep your heart healthy, but it also keeps your fat level low. Look at runners: they’re lean, regardless of age. The roll we get around the middle, even if hormonally motivated, is made of fat, and consistent cardio can help keep your fat level down. (The old Fit or Fat books by Covert Bailey are still among the best on this.) In addition, around menopause, weight training becomes more important than ever before in life. It not only protects your bones, but it shapes your body. Your abs might not be a washboard or a six-pack, but they can get pretty darned decent, and your waist, although not a Scarlett O’Hara 17 inches, won’t melt into oblivion. (You didn’t ask about thighs and triceps, but they’ll be a lot stronger, leaner, and more toned as well.) While cardio can help keep you fat level low, weight-training gives you muscle. Otherwise, you’d just be “skin and bones” – no shape, no energy, no sex appeal. With weight training in the mix, you’ve got your best shot at a youthful-looking body in your fifties, sixties, and beyond. Now, if you read Suzanne Somers’ books (Ageless: The Naked Truth About Biodentical Hormones and Suzanne Somers’ Slim and Sexy Forever: The Hormone Solution for Permanent Weight Loss and Optimal Living), I think she’ll tell you that taking bioidentical hormones will help keep your body pre-menopausally shaped for just about as long as you live. I am not making any medical recommendations, but if you want to read up on these from a source I trust, you can visit www.obrienrx.com. (Note: if you’ve sent in a question that I haven’t answered, I do have it and it will be answered, as they say on the voice mail, in the order in which it was received. If you have a question you’d like answered, please send it to charmedassistant@aol.com.)

Correction: The New York Times does it, so I guess we can, too... Last week, with the pumpkin pie recipe, I gave a wrong website for Lori Finlay Hamilton. The correct one is www.womenwisdomandwellness.com. (Sorry, Lori – and all of you who went to the site I listed and didn’t find her.

Have a great week, everybody!

All good things,

Victoria Moran